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Expert Career Advice ➜ Building a Future ➜ How to Tame Your Inner Critic

As beauty professionals, we're in the business of boosting people's self-image. But what about our own self-image? Even the most confident beauty pros will occasionally battle self-doubt. So if you're wondering how to tame your inner critic the next time it strikes, step right up. Below, you'll find seven strategies for slaying that big, bad monster.

1. Acknowledge the inner critic, but quickly redirect.

We can't help it when negative thoughts pop into our heads. But we can help how we respond to those thoughts. Acknowledge the doubts, concerns, and critiques. Then, do your best to redirect your attention to more positive or constructive thoughts. 

• Remind yourself about recent accomplishments. Try to conjure up those feelings of joy and satisfaction.
• Revisit and revise current goals. Breaking down your goals into more digestible "bites" might help quiet the inner critic. 
• Practice gratitude. If you're struggling to focus on what you're doing well (hey, we all have those days), then simply remind yourself what you're grateful for. As this article from Harvard Health Publishing notes, "Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships."

2. Get moving mentally and/or physically. 

Your inner critic wants you to fixate and ruminate. Don't give in to its desires. One of the best ways to shut down an inner critic is to ignore it. And one of the easiest ways to ignore it is by focusing your brain or your body (or both!) on something else. 

This might involve . . . 

• Going for a walk or exercising. Get the blood pumping to help you feel differently in your body and in your head. 
• Practicing mindfulness or meditation. Paying attention to your breathing immediately brings you to the here and now rather than the "what ifs" that the inner critic loves to whisper in your ear. 
• Talking to a trusted friend/family member. Sometimes venting our fears and frustrations is precisely what we need to do first before giving ourselves permission to move forward. 
• Journaling/writing. Journaling can be a great way to acknowledge and dismantle negative thoughts. But here's the key: After you finish writing, close the journal and do something else. 
• Practicing self-care. Your inner critic screams loudest when you're tired, hungry, sick, or overworked. Put your needs first and you'll find the critic's cries turn to whimpers. 
• Doing something for someone else. One of the best ways to get out of our own heads? Through volunteering or other efforts that make a positive impact on the world. 
• Learning something new. Ever notice how your mind can easily get absorbed in a crossword puzzle or YouTube tutorial? Do more of that when the critic begins to chatter. Hint: Milady Training has budget-friendly options that'll boost your knowledge while giving your brain something else to focus on. 
• Indulging in a distraction. Let your mind settle by doing something mindless. Binge on a new Netflix show. Take a long bath with your earbuds in. Go for a massage.

3. Forgive yourself for (sometimes) giving in. 

The inner critic knows exactly what buttons to push. After all, your inner critic is the critic to end all critics. And its siren song has lured many to crash on its metaphorical rocks. In other words, it's natural, normal, and understandable when the critic sometimes wins. 

You might have a stretch where you're dragging or feeling down. Be kind and gentle with yourself when this happens. But continue to work on the strategies outlined in #1 and #2. And if you can't get unstuck, jump to strategy #7 below. 

4. Ask yourself what you'd say to a friend or family member. 

All those yucky things the inner critic is telling you? Ask yourself how you'd respond to a friend or family member who told you their critic was saying the same negative stuff. What would you say? What advice would you give? What strategies would you suggest?

Sometimes it's easier to point out why someone else should ignore their inner critic when what we need to do is follow our own advice. 

5. Do occasional gut-checks in case your critic is onto something. 

Sometimes our inner critics have a point. How they make their points is almost always harsher than it needs to be. But sometimes the critic is trying to get our attention about something relevant. 

For example, maybe your inner critic has been giving you a hard time about not achieving your big dream when the real issue is that what you want has changed. Maybe you don't want your own salon, but you do want to move to LA and see if you have luck in Hollywood. The critic is whispering "failure," but a recalibrated dream isn't a failure—and your heart and gut know that. 

6. Don't participate in the comparison game on social media. 

Social media offers many positives for beauty professionals. It's a great place to learn skills, highlight talents, and connect with clients and prospective clients. But negatives exist, too. Most notably, social media makes it easy to fall into the comparison trap. And oh, does our inner critic love to compare us to others, right?! 

If you find your inner critic gets louder the longer you spend on social media, consider doing the following . . . 

• Limit your exposure. You can even download apps that will limit your screen time and block you from using certain social media platforms. 
• Remind yourself that most things on social media are staged. That "effortless" selfie that an influencer posted likely took a half-dozen takes (at least). Keep in mind that much of what you see isn’t real or that it’s only showing one small, narrow view. 
• Schedule your posts. If you feel you need to be on social media because of your job, take advantage of the various tools—like scheduling apps and autoresponders—so you can spend less time scrolling and comparing yourself to others. 
• Revise your feeds. Delete accounts that make you feel bad about yourself and focus on ones that make you feel calm and happy.

7. Seek help if you need it. 

If you have a particularly harsh inner critic, you might benefit from talking to someone with expertise in helping people navigate such issues. Remember, a regular diet of negative self-talk will adversely affect your mental health, so talking to a mental health counselor or therapist could help you better understand your inner critic's origins and how to dismantle its so-called "logic." 

Need a boost? Hang out with us. 

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